Ode to Jillian Michaels

Can we talk about how ridiculously excited I get about new episodes of The Biggest Loser. It's really embarrassing. Please stop laughing; I think it's a condition. So until the writers OFFICIALLY get back to work, I'm just going to have to wax poetic on Reality TV. And I know, I KNOW, ya'll. It's more than a little humiliating for a TV snob like me to get this into a Reality TV show (which is not on Bravo). But it's so good! And it's partly because of this woman:



I always KNEW that it wasn't really a workout unless someone was screaming or crying. Her training makes my time at the gym seem really weak, and I've run until I've gotten nauseated and thought "oh god, I want to die" several times now. She no longer reminds me of someone unpleasant anymore! I've grown beyond such comparisons. I think she's the right combination of bad-ass and softie, who really feels for her trainees. When she broke down crying in that one episode, I really believed her; truth be told, for me to believe that any person on Reality TV exhibits genuine human emotion when the cameras are rolling is a very impressive feat. And Wikipedia just told me that the reason she does this is that she was overweight as a child. It all makes sense now! She gets really connected with these people and that's so awesome! Okay, I know Bob does as well. Bob is cool too, guys; I don't want to seem too biased with the trainers. I'd be happy to have my ass kicked by either of them! But Bob seems to play the game more than Jillian, and he's got that male ego to contend with.

But I also like The Biggest Loser, because I'm such a sucker for a real transformation. It shouldn't surprise anyone that the reason I got hooked in the first place, was that I caught the finale of one of the seasons. It's so incredible! The winner always loses over half of his initial body weight. Can you even imagine losing an entire person in weight? Amazing! And everyone is so emotional, and there are so many tears, and the trainers are so proud. It got me. Everyone wins in this show, and I love it. I also love that it promotes healthy lifestyles and overall good well-being, which is something that this country definitely needs right now. So...I guess I'm being a patriotic American, promoting the health and well-being of an entire country by watching this TV show. Yeah, that's right.

And, I'm totally going to the gym tonight after I watch this episode. Even though my body still hurts from my workout on Sunday, and I'd much rather be eating another Klondike bar. I'll just pretend that Jillian is screaming at me. Problem solved.