Whiny McWhinerson

I've been having a not too happy summer. I don't really know why, but I've been in a funk for, like, a month. No real cause for it, but this malaise (post-college malaise perhaps? Alex?) has been settling gradually over the weeks. Maybe it's due to the fact that it's nice outside and I'm cooped up in an office building doing pointless busywork, since we've run out of meaningful busywork. Maybe it's due to the fact that I've been having more money issues than ever before. Maybe it's because my great-aunt has been slowly dying of lung cancer and just passed away last Friday.

Well, whatever the case, I've been shutting down a bit more than normal recently, and I need to cut it out. Mainly because I totally stopped working out. I haven't been pushing myself in the gym as much, and I haven't actually run in weeks. So, this has turned into a cycle of self-abuse. I feel down, so I don't want to go work out, so I don't get endorphins regularly coming in, so I get really out of shape, so I feel even worse. I've been going through endorphin withdrawal! The remedy has been Netflix and ordering in. Not good for my wallet or my health! And when I got Buffy, I've just been watching that and eating ice cream. Not that there's anything wrong with Buffy and ice cream, but I have to be active as well.

I actually realized this over the weekend, and have now managed to run my old pace on Monday and yesterday. This has been really hard to get back into, since I managed to get so out of shape. Tuesday I did some stairstepper (cop out!) and lifted a little. I'm seeing Joel on Sunday, and I'm a little scared. Not only is he going to kick my ass more than normal, but I feel bad about letting him down. I guess I've become one of those cliched people, or clichle, who wants to make her trainer proud. Damn my abusive relationship!

Also, I need to seriously clean my apartment. I wouldn't be surprised if people think I'm actually depressed from the way it looks.

Okay, so that's me. I'm already feeling better, and hopefully I'll be able to stick this one out. In the meantime, here's something happy:

Where the Hell is Matt?

I guess I'm slow on the uptake, because I'd never heard of him before this morning. That was pretty cool.

Why so Serious?

Okay, saw The Dark Knight on Sunday, and you know I have to throw in my two cents, or else I'll explode much like Marlena in Cloverfield. Firstly, I mostly agree with Eric, who totally beat me in talking about this movie. So...I'll talk about other things.

Spoilers be here, so I'll do the fancy thing and change the color of the text, so you'd have to highlight them to read the spoilers. Cause I need to talk the twists and turns and gut-wrenching moments. Now, Heath Ledger really makes the movie. His Joker was pretty perfect. And I really love the message that the movie was trying to make, and the fact that the Joker was pretty secondary to the plot. Although he was set up as the primary villain, and had the most screen time (which was always awesome), he was mostly a plot device to get the real story rolling (which is mostly why the movie took so long to get going--it was like 2 movies squished together). Harvey Dent becoming Two-Face is the real focus of the story and it was pretty spectacular; mostly because we could completely understand his murderous rage because of his own disfigurement and being party to the traumatic death of the woman he (and Batman!) loved. The Joker pulled a number on him, and we feel truly bad for Dent. He was a real person, unlike the caricature that Tommy Lee Jones portrayed. And the makeup was truly, uh, icky, for lack of a better word. What were those, 5th degree burns? On one level, the Joker won. And, that's pretty cool. But on another, he lost spectacularly, and I think that was even cooler.

I'm referring to the scene with the river boats. The moment that the hardened criminal threw the detonator out of the window, so that the boatload of innocent people could be spared was pretty damn amazing to me. But, maybe I'm a sucker for moments when you realize humanity isn't as crappy as everyone thinks. It just gets me. For a movie that had so many unnecessary scenes, the emotional payoff of all the filmmakers' setup is pretty good.

Now, I'm concerned about the inevitable next movie. How can they not make a third part now with all the money being thrown at them right now? But, who can possibly top Heath Ledger as the Joker? What villain could possibly come close to that? The story as it is now is really interesting, and they set up a great plotline for the next movie, where Batman is concerned. Batman was always towing the line between good guy and bad guy, so it was nice to see a movie where Batman made too many wrong turns, and got much darker than normal--to set up the fact that he's taking the fall for a good man, whom Gotham needs as a symbol more than Batman. The next movie should be interesting. What villain could be brought in, though? Maybe they'll surprise me, but I don't see how they could possibly top that Joker, who is not only Batman's greatest foe, but was also played to perfection. I hope they do surprise me, though, because this interpretation of a comic book is pretty awesome, and I don't want to see it go out with a whimper.

Tacos and Trump Thursday

I'm a couple of days late on this, but first thing's first, RIP Estelle Getty. My Golden Girls counterpart, Sophia. At this point, I can't say it better than everyone else has, so I'll just go with the now cliched "thank you for being a friend." I totally stole that from The Fug Girls and numerous other places, but whatever, it fits.

As I enjoy my taco dinner from La Cocina, I'm doing something a bit ridiculous. Out of sheer curiosity, I decided to look up the blueprints of the penthouse apartments in the still-rising Trump Tower, which has now become one of the most prominent features of the Chicago skyline. The 89th floor residence (which Donnie has set aside for himself) is particularly ridiculous. Here: Check it out. Dude. And, after a nosy bit of digging, I discovered that the cost of that penthouse is $28 million. 14,260 sq. feet. 5 bedrooms, 6 baths. 16 foot ceilings. Holy crap, Donald Trump. Damn. The only thing that's missing there is an actual library, but seriously, what Billionaires, with a capital B, have time to read, anyway? Kind of puts my crappy little studio into perspective. Not that this penthouse should put anything into perspective, since approximately .0001% of the population can even afford to step foot in it. Even in my world of make believe, I'd never be able to imagine living in a condo like that.

Buffy Update: Not that many of you care, but I'm partway through the third season now. In retrospect, I genuinely believe that the third season was probably the best one of the series. None of the episodes, so far, have been misses; in fact, some of the episodes that I've remembered and cherished for years took place in the third season. Classic Buffy at its best. The vastly tonally different episodes Anne, Band Candy, The Wish, and Amends have all been pretty spectacular, and I'm not even halfway through the season. In fact, I'd say that some of these episodes top even some of the better Firefly episodes. At least for me. That's probably due to the fact that I clearly remember watching them as a teenage girl--the exact demographic that Joss Whedon was writing for. There's just something so satisfying about watching a flawed, emotionally vulnerable girl kick so much ass--kind of makes you feel like you can do anything. Which is kinda the whole point of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, anyway. Not to mention-- VAMPIRES! SO MANY VAMPIRES! That is all.

If anything, this is helping wean me off of Bravo TV. I'll still watch Project Runway, but not as many reruns on weekends. I've got geekier things to do now.

Grr...Argh...

At the Very Least, I'd Have to Read Adorno

Gather round, all ye readers, for I have discovered something amazing.

In my attempts to better understand the mechanics of the movie-going experience, I have rediscovered my interest in camp. Or rather, a need to understand why people like camp, as I'm not sure I do anymore. Sure, it's fun, but I also find glorying in campiness to be easy and a little too spiteful for a movie-watching experience. Since I miss research (seriously, I DO) and am frequently bored and brain dead at work, I decided to go into the classic UChicago databases to see if I can find any academic materials relating to the analysis of camp in movies. Well, I found some. Not too many, but enough to sate me.

However, what I did discover was the wonderful periodical entitled Cinema Journal. I know, I know, big whoop. Film students everywhere are probably cringing at my newfound joy. I don't care! Two of my favorite interests--analysis and films--together in one source! It's very academic, and probably extremely annoying to analyze film in this way, but I freakin' love it. Listen to what some of the articles are (by the way, I found these by searching "James Bond"): Birth Traumas: Parturition and Horror in "Rosemary's Baby", Feminist Enterprise? "Star Trek: The Next Generation" and the Occupation of Femininity, The Poetics of Horror: More than Meets the Eye, "Too Close for Comfort": "American Beauty" and the Incest Motif, The Metafictional Hitchcock: The Experience of Viewing and the Viewing of Experience in "Rear Window" and "Psycho" and the list goes on and on.

[ETA: I had three well thought out paragraphs after this point, but Blogger decided to have one of its spells, as I tried to publish the post, and lost them (a strange thing, because it had been saving my work regularly, even after I'd written this much). So, the remaining paragraphs have been hastily written through gritted teeth and muttered expletives. Just thought you should know what I do for you people.]

Now I know this sort of analysis often guts the movie-going experience, and seems overly pretentious to even the most annoying academics. Many times, because people often act snarky towards less, um, involved movies, in order to show off how clever they are (another reason why camp isn't so cool anymore). There is a reason why nobody wants to watch movies with U of C kids (And yeah, I know I'm being slightly hypocritical here. Shut up.). Oftentimes, I like to shut out the analytic side of my brain and enjoy a movie simply for the plot presented to me. But, I like knowing that the option is available, if I want to indulge my nerdy leanings. It's funny, but I was never into over-analysis in most of my UChicago classes; however, give me a good movie to watch and I turn into "That Kid." I know I do. I know I annoy people. I don't care. And I know that people can read waaaay too much into movies, but isn't that what entertainment is really about? I mean the fact that you can, at times, enjoy a really good movie on two different levels (at least) is just cool.

Good movies/tv shows/web series are enjoyable no matter how you see them. And, agree or disagree with the points of the above articles, but they are sure to provide interesting food for thought. Movies don't have to be brainless entertainment! Like I've ranted about before, whenever Hollywood makes us work to connect complicated points by presenting them in an entirely entertaining manner, I say that's a damn good movie. DAMN. GOOD.

It's a shame I'm no expert--Cinema Journal seems to favor individuals who can actually articulate using examples from literature, history, cinema classics etc., as opposed to my style, which is more based in gut reactions. I'd love to get into a medium where I can wax poetic on what I find interesting about some movies, and how I read into their many, many onion layers.

...

Wait a second...

Dr. Horrible? Dr. AWESOME!

What, Are the Birds Going to Explode upon Impact?

Before I get into the inevitable rant, I've been trying to access the Dr. Horrible website all morning, since the first part of the epic supervillain musical is supposed to be posted today. The site has been clogged by too much traffic ALL MORNING. I guess rabid Joss Whedon fans (Whedonites? Whedonians? Whedes?) are all flocking in droves. DROVES. Can't say I blame them, really. I've been pretty consistently trying to get on since I remembered the first act was going to be posted today. Ah well, I'll see it eventually, and probably geek out over it here.

On to more pressing matters. It has recently come to my attention that a particular movie, which I enjoy highly in its original form, is being remade. That's right, Alfred Hitchcock's avian thriller, The Birds, is being remade. Guess who's the Executive Producer? Go on, take a guess. Give up? MICHAEL BAY. Yeah, Mr. Let's Sacrifice Plot Development so we Can Have Big Explosions and Improbable Action. This is the guy that RUINED the X-Men franchise for me, because he changed the whole tone of the series, making it more about action and less about the social issues, which is the heart of the X-Men series. Just because it's a comic book doesn't mean you can gloss over what Stan Lee actually wanted to say with the series. GOD.

And now I'm terrified. It's bad enough that Roman Polanski's Rosemary's Baby is being remade (yeah, by Mr. Bay again as Exec Producer), but why do you have to mess with Hitchcock? Isn't he the great standard many filmmakers aspire towards? Why would you mess with perfection? CGI does not, in fact, make everything better and more realistic.

I am making a big deal over this now, because I just recently watched The Birds, and loved it. Hitchcock dealt in times where visual effects were pretty nonexistent. He had to be inventive with camera angles and real bird wrangling and puppetry and use of the generally newish green screen technology. The part that made me believe that thousands of birds were attacking a small coastal community was the incredibly impressive acting as well as the suspense Mr. Hitchcock was so wonderful at producing with his cinematography and editing. I was on the edge of my seat worrying about these people (I admit, I'd never seen it before, and purposefully never spoiled myself so I'd be surprised). That's a good movie.

Michael Bay does not deal in movies of this sort. He goes for crazy action and cheesy scripts. I'm concerned. And, who the hell is going to be the leading lady in this movie? If it's Lindsey Lohan, I quit. The reason that I wanted to see The Birds is because I read a favorable review of The Happening once, which compare it to The Birds. After watching Hitchcock's movie, I concluded that the reviewer hadn't actually seen The Birds. The beauty of Hitchcock is he doesn't explicitly show violence happen, thereby creating a certain tension with an individual and heightening imagination. He's also SO VERY GOOD at dragging suspense out, and torturing his audience. By not showing anything graphically(or very little), Hitchcock allowed audiences to work for it more, thereby getting more involved in the story and the characters. For me, The Happening did the exact opposite, which I've already ranted about previously.

This should be a lesson to filmmakers, since I feel like I'm in a position to give filmmakers advice, of course. Just because you can do it does not mean you should do it. CGI should be used to enhance plot points, not replace them. I feel like that's where lots of people go wrong, and get too excited about showing ridiculous special effects. It's one thing if the movie is merely meant to be fun and a mindless adrenaline rush (like Wanted), but The Birds has already been done well, and I just don't think it's a movie that's worth redoing, especially since I doubt it'll be more interesting than the original.

Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe these remakes will rock. I just wish Hollywood would go back to being original and interesting. I miss that.

Geekend Update

So, I saw Wanted this Saturday, and I gotta say, it was pretty good. And by that, I mean if you forget about physics and ignore the obvious cliches. Other than that, it was loads of fun. The action was pretty constant and properly badass, and you can't ever really go wrong with Angelina Jolie in the type of role she is obviously destined to make. Two scenes in particular were egregious misuses of the laws of physics, especially for a movie that almost tries to hoodwink the audience into believing that these sorts of things could actually be possible, by maintaining a certain level of realism throughout the film. It's kind of a movie about superpowers that's trying to look like it's possible in our world, handwaved by having ordinary people perform superhuman feats simply because they trained hard. At least in The Matrix, we always saw them as existing (physically and mentally) separately from "normal people" therefore able to do things that those who haven't been awakened would be unable to do. But these all sound like criticisms, when they certainly aren't. This is my need to pick apart every movie I see, regardless of level of enjoyment. IT'S FROM A COMIC BOOK (or graphic novel, I forget). It was lots of fun with lots of triumphant "yeah!" moments, and I would certainly go see it again. Did I mention that most of it took place in the streets of Chicago? Some of it was around my office! The El had a large role in this movie, and I certainly enjoyed seeing it zooming around on its tracks. Also, Angelina Jolie= reliably awesome action.

Zelda Update: I played a little on Saturday morning and I am now up to the first dungeon; I actually have completed most of it to get the bow & arrows. I ran out of time (an important factor in Majora's Mask), so I'll have to go through the whole temple again in order to defeat the first boss and do the important stuff in the swamp available after defeating him. Next time I play, I should be through the first temple and on my way to becoming a Goron. [Apologies for those who have no idea what I'm talking about--it's not actually as geeky as it sounds. Really.]

Also, a coworker lent me all 7 seasons of Buffy the Vampire Slayer, since I mentioned that I loved the show, but haven't watched it in years. I think she feels the need to reciprocate because I lent her The Office and got her addicted. So, that's what I did on Sunday. Eight episodes of Buffy. Eight! It was awesome. I forgot about the first season, and how rough all the characters were. Unlike Firefly, Buffy was a little rougher around the edges at first. Still, undeniably awesome and one of the better teen dramas that the WB ever had. And, once it got going, it was one of the best shows on the air period. I still believe that. Say what you will about wanting to watch a snarky teenage girl slay vampires and demons and other magical stuff, but Joss Whedon knows how to write, and Buffy was his baby. I'm plowing through the early episodes so I can get to Seasons 2-3, when it really starts getting intense. I'm going to lose my shit when they introduce characters like Spike and Faith.

So, I guess I'm having a good time with life right now. My inner geek needs walking every now and then, and right now I'm letting her loose.

And now I can't help but ponder who would win in a fight--Buffy Summers or Lara Croft?

The Ballad of the Wind Fish is Da Bomb

I have a confession to make. Please bear with me, because this very personal and embarrassing. I am in love with The Legend of Zelda. Now, this is not a secret, but it's just started coming back to me, about how much I loved those games. I blame it on my coworker, who keeps regaling me with stories about how he stays up all night playing Metal Gear. He's the one getting married in a month, by the way. But, I guess through his great desire to talk about the intricate story lines of that game, I have rediscovered my own love. Of a little elf boy named Link, who wears green clothes, who runs around killing monsters with a sword and bow & arrow and hookshot. AND OCARINA! Yay!

So I plugged in the N64 last night, for the first time in years. I decided to go with Majora's Mask, the most messed up game ever invented. Awesome. I've already played through the first three days of the game, and it. was. so. much. FUN. I forgot how freaky the animation is. I mean, this is the moon (OF DOOM):

And the titular mask:

It's looking at MY SOUL.

The transformation sequences are particularly freaky, where Link changes into various creatures/peoples using different masks. It's always a really intense, with Link giving a curdling scream as we watch the obviously painful transformation. These games terrified me when I was younger, to the point where I couldn't finish certain dungeons. I know, I know--it's just a game. But, if you're saying that, you obviously haven't played through enough. This game has lots of screaming and jump moments. The scary music never helped matters! Maybe now I've grown up enough where I can play it more fully.

I mean, I'm not going to turn into one of these people:

(Although I can tell which tunic she's currently wearing to vanquish the mask. Yo, don't judge!)

Zelda just seems like an overall fun game: you get to play magical songs with the ocarina, help people to get fun prizes, and get to kill things with a sword! All in a lovely pastoral/medieval-type setting. Sigh. Legend of Zelda was my very first game (on Gameboy--I never had the original Nintendo), and currently the only 2 games I own for my N64.

Oh, this reminds me of the great IGN April Fool's Day joke from this past year. I'll be the first to admit that it totally suckered me in, and got me so excited. Here, check it out: Best Hoax Ever. Fans of the game from far and wide nearly exploded with dweeby joy and then excruciating torment. And, actually, given the reaction, they should totally make that movie. It would be extremely lucrative, and probably much better than other video games already turned into movies, like, say, Doom. I mean, it's got already got a good plot, interesting characters, and a magical world to be able to create a compelling movie. I'd go see it.

The Universe is Against Me

OKAY SORRY PEOPLE--I DIDN'T KNOW THE DR HORRIBLE LINK DIDN'T WORK--IT IS FIXED NOW! GO CHECK IT OUT. NOW!

First--this is pure distilled reality tv show cliche awesomeness: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w536Alnon24.

Second--WHY IS MY CAT MESSING WITH MY HEAD? Don't let her fool you, with her little chirpy flights of fancy, and her desperate chase of the offensive shiny mice. SHE KNOWS EXACTLY WHAT SHE'S DOING. She likes to play these cute little games, where she pretends she can't walk and pulls her leg up like that one time when she had the infection, and nearly gave me a heart attack. She's a good faker, that one. Pretending not to walk, and chuckling at my deepening panic. She deserved a freakin' Oscar for yowling loudly, when I touched her stump. I was planning on going in to the vet to get more antibiotics, because, you know what, Nubs, I CARE. I care enough to put aside my financial devastation to get you your damn costly meds. I would do that for you. You, however, clearly think this is a funny game, because what do I get when I wake up in the morning? You chasing Gus. You jumping on the coffee table. You running around like a spooked Clydesdale. Well, you know what Nubs, I'M GLAD YOU HAD THOSE LAUGHS. I really am. I even called the vet today to discover my vet is no longer with them, so tomorrow I'm going to get a call from a random vet at that clinic and have to explain that my cat was JUST KIDDING.

Apparently my computer was just kidding too. I'm finishing this entry on it. On Thursday evening, I came home and found my computer cord dead, with chew marks all along it. I couldn't tell if the chewing was the reason the charger was dead or not, so I checked all the connections as well as the wall plug. I changed the plug and everything, before deciding that the cord had lived its life. I got electrical tape the next day in a vain effort to try to mend it, but it didn't seem to work. I've since been trying to deal with the fact that I couldn't have a computer until the next time I get paid, and then I'd have to shell out $70 for another new power cord for a computer that's on its death bed. But, when I came back from work today, the little green chargy light was on! What? Was it sleeping? I don't...I can't...I NEED A MOMENT HERE.

Is my apartment some freakish Lazarus Pit, where living and NOT LIVING things can heal themselves? Am I some sort of prophet? Should I set up a side business where I can let cancer patients just mill around the apartment for a few days until they feel better? Well, I'm not feeding them, I can tell you that.

Or, the more likely excuse, someone's messing with me. I'm ready for your parry, reader, and I can say that I know I'm paranoid. Sometimes paranoia is justified--like when SOMEONE IS MESSING WITH YOU. They want to make me feel crazy so they can disarm me and learn my secrets. Like--well I HAVE SECRETS OKAY.

What?

Why are you looking at me like that?

The computer broke me, okay.

Must. Contain. MANIC GLEE.

I've known about this for quite some time, but I hadn't checked out the website until now. And it. is. AWESOME.

This may not be everyone's cup of tea, but it's certainly mine. Namely, chai with generous helpings of cream and sugar. Or possibly sweet iced tea with a dash of lemon. Depends how hot it is outside.

So, it is my great pleasure to present...

JOSSWHEDONPLUSDOOGIEHOWSERPLUSCAP'NTIGHTPANTSPLUSSINGINGPLUSSUPERVILLAINY

Seriously, Joss Whedon is amazing. AMAZING. At least I can probably count on Eric to geek out with me. Here's the official poster: