Excuse Me, I Have to Wash the Tool out of My Hair

Okay, so I just had a very interesting interaction at the bus stop on my way back from work. Here it is in its entirety. Italics represent my thoughts, but you could've probably figured that out for yourself. Behold how my foot sinks further and further into my mouth!

La la la. Waiting for the bus stop. Oh, that's a person I recognize. She was in my graduating class. Oh crap, what was her name? Is she one of those people who will make a point to not acknowledge me, because we both went to the U of C, or really friendly because of it? Oh god, don't look, don't look. Pretend you're looking at the street for the bus. You're not creepily observant, no siree. Oh shoot, she's coming up to me. Waving! She's waving now. What'shernamewhat'shernamewhat'shername? She's here. Quick, pretend you didn't see her until this very moment!

Me: Hi! How's it going?
Classmate I can't remember: Hi, do you remember me? We went to the University of Chicago together.

What'shernamewhat'shernamewhat'shername?

Me: Of course! How are you? I didn't see you. Liar.
Classmate I can't remember: Yeah, you're Cristina from San Antonio, right?

Crap.

Me: Um, yeah that's right...

I can't believe we don't remember her name. She was in that thing that we did before school started. She was nice. God, WHAT IS HER NAME? Why can you remember Buffy's middle name, and you're blanking on who this real person is? You're never going to be able to improvise, so you better fess up.

Me: Um, I'm really sorry, but I don't remember your...
Classmate I can't remember: Melissa.

Oh YEAH. We had that thing together.

[At this point in the narrative, the part of the Classmate I can't remember will be played by Melissa, whom I marginally remember.]

Me: Oh yeah we had uhm...
Melissa: HUM together.
Me: Right. HUM. YES! THAT'S RIGHT.

Oh, god, would you look at yourself? Why are you practically yelling at her? Overcompensate much? Oh yeah, keep gesticulating wildly, 'cause you don't look like a massive tool at all.

Me: So how are you?

You've said that like five times now, seriously. Is that my bus? Please let that be my bus.

Melissa: Good. So, are you still living in Chicago?
Me: Yeah, I work right there in that building.
Melissa: Which one?
Me: That one. The one I'm pointing at.

Okay, finally she's looking in the right place. Oh, I think she's still talking. I can't hear her. God, what if she's asking me something? Oh, she's done now. SMILE AND NOD. SMILE AND NOD.

Melissa: You went to the reunion thing a few months ago, right?
Me: Yeah, it was fun.
Melissa: Yeah, I saw you there. I wanted to say hi, but didn't get the chance to.
Me: Oh, yeah, it was crazy crowded.

Okay, now you've created an awkward silence. Quick be funny, or self-depricating, or clever. GOD, WHAT USE ARE YOU?

Melissa: Well, I have to go to the gym now. But I just wanted to say hi, because it was so nice to see a familiar face.
Me: Yes! So nice! It was really nice to see you too.

And she's walking off now. I think we just had a sitcom moment. A bad sitcom moment. You're kind of a dick. You know that, right? When's the damn bus getting here?

Additional Awesomeness

As a PS other other other other thing, check it.

I just found this movie test, and it's by far one of the more creative ones I've ever played.

Here, give it a whirl: http://www.stationerymovies.com/

I originally got 14/20, which I'm pretty proud of, since I haven't seen many of the movies.

Kay, go about your business now.

OMG NEW POST

I swear that I will never use "omg" again in my life. And if I do, someone please point it out, because I'm sure my look of horror will be quite amusing.

I haven't felt too talky recently, and I guess that's okay. And, yesterday, after my landlady finally informed me that my August rent check bounced (which I was expecting--also, just in time for September rent, which makes me oh-so-happy), I confirmed that yes, I will be renewing my lease. For the box. I guess I only have myself to blame, since I shut myself off during the crucial apartment finding weeks. I also really, really didn't want to actually move. I'm okay with it, but eh. Just eh. After I get the rent thing situated, I think I'm going to try to fix up the apartment to try to make it feel less dorm-like and more like a place that I can actually comfortably live in. Some organization would be nice as well, and would go a long way towards helping me feel like a real person.

In other news, Gus is turning into a dog. He now demands belly rubs. Frequently. Whenever I come home, grumbling from a long day's work, he gives me a plaintive meow and flops himself upside down on the ground. I don't really know how this started, but I really like it. He's getting to be a very sweet cat, and isn't nearly as neurotic as I thought he'd end up being. Nubs, meanwhile, is getting just plain weird, which I'm sure is my influence entirely. She now has a favorite creepy hobby: watching me brush my teeth. I swear, every morning and every evening, whenever I go to brush my teeth she tears across the apartment, jumps on the toilet, and stares at me. I'm not even exaggerating. I wonder what's so fascinating about my teeth. Maybe she's trying to tell me that I should schedule a dentist's appointment. Naw, it's probably just "Hey. You. Get me my shiny mouse from under the table." They're good people, those cats.

In other other news, WHY DON'T I OWN THIS T-SHIRT? I may have to go to the Threadless store this weekend or something. Oh, and to finish up the Buffy talk (which I'm now totally done with, by the way) I took a pretty involved Buffy personality test last week, and I'm totally Willow! A. Awesome, she's always been my favorite character, since I was, like, 12! B. I REALLY AM SO WILLOW. C. I guess this means all y'all better, uh, watch out? When I eventually snap, I'm going to SNAP. Maybe a vacation is in order.

In other other other news, I'm writing a book! Or, well, trying that is. More on this to follow, but I've got a pretty solid idea, and am now trying to get past the writer's block/horrible numbing fear of failure. Wish me luck!

Your Logic is Insane and Happenstance, Like that of a Troll

I was going to write a mournful blog posting about how my apartment hates me and wants me to suffer as much as humanly possible; however, since seeing a psychic on Sunday, and having to deal with a CRAZY MAD RUSH OF WORK here, I'm pretty much over that. By the by, I totally took out my bag o' runes on Monday morning before work, and asked what the day would be like (as ya do), pulling out one rune randomly to represent what would be going on in the day. The one I took out means "thorn" and is used to represent intense struggle or conflict that a person would expect to go through. Later on at work I put in 55 files in the database (normally, I put in fewer than 5 a day) and then we got 8 MASSIVELY HIGH PRIORITY files that needed to be dealt with immediately. Needless to say, it has been a stressful situation here. I guess that reinforced my belief in what the psychic told me, cause apparently the forces of nature are trying to beat something into my head. Cool.

In other news, I finally finished my impressive marathon of Buffy the Vampire Slayer a couple of days ago. I think it had a damn good ending, and I gotta admit, I got a little misty eyed during the emotional climax. The ending was very successful in keeping with the themes that the show has reinforced since the pilot. Many fans hated the finale, but I thought it worked really well and had a wonderful emotional payoff. Afterwards, I immediately watched the commentaries on the first two episodes, and it was so crazy. The show changed so much in seven years, in terms of character development and scope, and going back to the beginning again was quite jarring. And also, quite cool. Some episodes (and seasons **cough6cough**) were misses, but overall, it's still one of the best shows I've ever seen. I know I've been heavy with the Joss love recently, but damn can that man write. In a single episode he can make you all melty with the romance, then laugh at the funny, then rip your still-happy heart out of your chest. I'm so looking forward to Dollhouse just to see what new stuff he can pull out of his magic hat. (Actually, let me say that there are some things I don't agree with in his writing--namely that nobody can ever actually be happy. I know that's how drama is created, but it seems like he's gotten too predictable about how he treats relationships; basically, once characters start being happy together, something horrible is going to happen to one of them. He can't not do it. Whatever, he's still one of the best people at crafting compelling stories, and I'll watch and enjoy anything he creates.)




As an interesting segue, I think I've made a new friend in my building. I've always been friendly with people in the building, and have had many talks in the elevator, but ever since losing both the power and the water, we have been as kin. United in some unholy war against the elements. Bitching about being unable to go to work. It's been fun. But I've chit-chatted with this girl before, and she seems pretty similar to me in general. She's on my floor, so I catch her going to the elevator sometimes, and we chat about stupid stuff. I mentioned I just rewatched all of Buffy and she got really excited. Turns out she does it pretty regularly, and sees nothing wrong with my Joss-love. I think we could be friends. If I see her again sometime soon, I may invite her to hang out, since I don't know too many people on the north side still. It would be nice to have a geeky pal who lives near me (as in down the hall!).

I'm Getting Sicker by the Hour

Can y'all believe it's already August? I can't. Where has this summer gone? I didn't do anything fun outside. At all. I guess there's still time, but I am slightly disheartened by the fact I am so capable of wasting opportunities. Let's go to the zoo!

In the meanwhile, I've taken to creeping myself out at work. I've already mentioned TV Tropes, which has all sorts of trope definitions and examples from different sorts of media, as well as real life. They're usually written in a fairly entertaining manner, as well, which often leads to hours of wasted time giggling to myself in front of my computer. My coworkers probably think I'm completely insane.

And, I kind of am, as I've taken to creeping myself the hell out through certain aspects of this website called: Rule of Scary, Nightmare Fuel, Nightmare Fuel Unleaded, And I Must Scream, and the wonderful examples provided in Nightmare Valley (Uncanny Valley taken to its creepiest extreme.) The video on my Facebook page is actually one of the examples of Nightmare Fuel that I particularly enjoyed. Remember, it was made for children. Reading about them isn't bad enough to creep a person out, but lots of the examples link to Youtube clips (like the above example) and links to pictures. Plenty of quotes too. An example of Nightmare Fuel they provide is a chilling (for me at least) description of the ReDeads in The Legend of Zelda, and what they do to you. They were one of the reasons I used to have such trouble playing those games.

To make a long story short (too late!) I've been saturated in creepiness to the point where it's spilling over into my real life. When I got lunch today, I went to the Thompson Center on Lake. To get to the food court from my building, I have to go down a really slow escalator, and the air gets more stale and hot the further you go down. You have to pass through run down revolving doors to get to the food court area. My first thought when I went down the escalators was "huh, this would be a great place for a lunchtime zombie outbreak." Seriously. So many people in an underground space. Then, access to the outdoors through escalators leading through the building, which is the home base of countless businesses. You could probably infect most of downtown in a manner of hours.

Maybe I need to get outside more, is all I'm saying.